Steven Seagal
20-05-2012, 05:29 PM
Howdy Folks,
This is a review of Lily.
Before I review Lily I want to raise two issues. One is of a practical nature and the other is more of an emotional/psychological one. The first relates to items essential for punting and the second relates to why it is hard to have clarity in evaluating what’s going on in a punt.
First I think it is vital that we recognise there are essential items that we must take on every punt.
It is my view that the essential Items for punting are:
• One 90 watt light globe and two lamps with globes already inserted: In brothels they want to keep the punter literally in the dark, hence the 2 watt light bulbs in the room. No one in the industry wants you to be aware of how filthy and rat urine infested their places are. Further, they also do not want you to see what the lady really looks like. In that subdued lighting she can mix up the digits of her age and instead of telling you she is 62 years old can fudge it and say she is 26. You won’t notice half of her teeth are missing or that deep scar from that car crash she had. With that 60 watt globe inserted in their lamp and two lamps of your own, without shades, you can know what the score is in this set up and what’s happening. For example, you discover she isn’t sucking your cock but instead is gripping it with a pair of pliers or a Stillson wrench!
• Three clean towels: With the lamps and globes you can see the shower is filthy. Also the towels in these joints only have a service after the 50,000th bloke. With one towel you can place it outside the shower for when you dry off. Another towel is used for drying off and the third on the floor of the shower so you’re not making contact with the shower floor.
• Two pillowcases and a sheet: For all you know these sheet and pillowcases have NEVER been cleaned. They are probably full of enough lice and bacteria to kill the entire Chinese Army in a day.
• An inflatable air mattress and pump: Like Goldilocks the bed may be too hard or soft and with the pump and the air mattress you can make it ‘just right’.
• An inflatable ‘Love Doll’: I remember the boxing magazine Ring Magazine used to advertise these. They were ‘life size’ and the ad said you could put ‘her’ in your car and drive around and impress your friends. God knows what type of friends you’d have that they’d be impressed by this! These may be purchased at any adult shop, but one word of caution is that the lady on the box will not look like the lady you blow up with your mattress pump. Why the doll? Well, she will save you money in the event you want a threesome and she will be compliant and not ask for money or tips. (She will automatically offer any extras you want).
• ‘Thin’ condoms: In most joints they use industrial strength ones and it would take a bazooka fired directly into you crotch to have any sensation at all. Hence, with the thin ones you feel less like a non-participant observer and more in the thick of things.
• (For married men) A duplicate set of clothes and Brut aftershave and deodorant: Use Brut all the time. You wife will get used to it and in the event a ‘bad odor’ occurs this shit will knock it out. Have a duplicate set of punter clothes as you never know what could get spilled or stained onto the gear you are wearing.
• Hand sanitiser: This is good for rubbing on your pubic area to help avoid getting some nasty bacterial that will lead to the mange and difficulty in explaining to loved ones or in the locker room.
• A bottle of liquid pump soap: Some brothels have cakes of soap and gents you don’t want to wash your arse on a piece of soap that 10,000 underserving poor have wiped their arses with.
• A set of slippers: The floors in the joins were the repository of condoms from the previous 500 fucks and that floor hasn’t ever been washed. Catch my drift?
• Incense sticks, holder and a lighter: This knocks out the bad odor in the joint and can help it become a ‘spiritual experience’.
• A hammer, nails and wood: Having this is being prepared. Once I saw a sign that said ‘Rooms for $50 a night but you must make your own bed’. Once inside they gave me hammer, nails and wood. Also you might need these to repair the roof or something so it doesn’t fall in on you while you are doing the dirty deed.
• One litre bottle of Listerine: This is good for the mouth to clean it out as best as you can, plus can be a substitute for the hand sanitiser if you forget to bring it.
This is not everything you will need. It is just the bare essentials.
The second thing I want to mention is that evaluating what’s going on after a session is over is problematic as in life we don’t often know what is happening or why.
My nephew Efrem Zimbalist Farquar and I were talking the other day and the following interaction occurred.
Steven: Have you ever noticed that people don’t know what’s going on most of the time?
Farquar: What do you mean?
Steven: If you ask someone “How are you?” and they say “Bad” and you ask “Why?” What happens?
Farquar: I guess they tell you what’s happening that is bad for them.
Steven: Right. But if you ask them how they are and they say “Good” and you ask “Why?’ What happens then?
Farquar: You tell me.
Steven: They usually get a strange expression and usually say “I don’t know”.
Farquar: You’re kidding.
Steven: Try it and you’ll get the dumb look and “I don’t know”.
And that is true. When people are happy and things going well they don’t know why. So usually we are out of touch with what is happening to us about 50% of the time.
This brings us to Lily.
Let me note that except for the hand sanitiser I did NOT bring the essential items I should have. You guessed it, the room was dark and I was lucky to see my hand in front of my face!
I deliberately asked for Lily even though I had not seen her before based on some previous reviews I’d read somewhere.
Lily said she was 26, but I suspect 36. She has a pretty face, almost D cups with nice dark nipples. She has a bit of a tummy, but is no bbw. She has a trimmed pussy that is reasonably tight and her English is functional for the situation at hand.
She is quite friendly and service oriented. She is prepared to offer dfk, gfe, bbj with cim and covered sex in any and all positions and does all this with a positive attitude. I really liked her face and her manner was quite appealing. She was especially effective in cowgirl where she had a nice sway to her hips that was exciting. There was a little, but not too much, FOAM (FAKE ORGASM AND MOANING).
After the punt I exchanged the following text messages with Farquar.
Farquar: How was the punt?
Steven: Good.
Farquar: Why?
Steven: (Strange expression on my face) I don’t know.
When will our paths cross in my next review? I don’t know that either.
Next review from this dump will be Kylie.
Steven
This is a review of Lily.
Before I review Lily I want to raise two issues. One is of a practical nature and the other is more of an emotional/psychological one. The first relates to items essential for punting and the second relates to why it is hard to have clarity in evaluating what’s going on in a punt.
First I think it is vital that we recognise there are essential items that we must take on every punt.
It is my view that the essential Items for punting are:
• One 90 watt light globe and two lamps with globes already inserted: In brothels they want to keep the punter literally in the dark, hence the 2 watt light bulbs in the room. No one in the industry wants you to be aware of how filthy and rat urine infested their places are. Further, they also do not want you to see what the lady really looks like. In that subdued lighting she can mix up the digits of her age and instead of telling you she is 62 years old can fudge it and say she is 26. You won’t notice half of her teeth are missing or that deep scar from that car crash she had. With that 60 watt globe inserted in their lamp and two lamps of your own, without shades, you can know what the score is in this set up and what’s happening. For example, you discover she isn’t sucking your cock but instead is gripping it with a pair of pliers or a Stillson wrench!
• Three clean towels: With the lamps and globes you can see the shower is filthy. Also the towels in these joints only have a service after the 50,000th bloke. With one towel you can place it outside the shower for when you dry off. Another towel is used for drying off and the third on the floor of the shower so you’re not making contact with the shower floor.
• Two pillowcases and a sheet: For all you know these sheet and pillowcases have NEVER been cleaned. They are probably full of enough lice and bacteria to kill the entire Chinese Army in a day.
• An inflatable air mattress and pump: Like Goldilocks the bed may be too hard or soft and with the pump and the air mattress you can make it ‘just right’.
• An inflatable ‘Love Doll’: I remember the boxing magazine Ring Magazine used to advertise these. They were ‘life size’ and the ad said you could put ‘her’ in your car and drive around and impress your friends. God knows what type of friends you’d have that they’d be impressed by this! These may be purchased at any adult shop, but one word of caution is that the lady on the box will not look like the lady you blow up with your mattress pump. Why the doll? Well, she will save you money in the event you want a threesome and she will be compliant and not ask for money or tips. (She will automatically offer any extras you want).
• ‘Thin’ condoms: In most joints they use industrial strength ones and it would take a bazooka fired directly into you crotch to have any sensation at all. Hence, with the thin ones you feel less like a non-participant observer and more in the thick of things.
• (For married men) A duplicate set of clothes and Brut aftershave and deodorant: Use Brut all the time. You wife will get used to it and in the event a ‘bad odor’ occurs this shit will knock it out. Have a duplicate set of punter clothes as you never know what could get spilled or stained onto the gear you are wearing.
• Hand sanitiser: This is good for rubbing on your pubic area to help avoid getting some nasty bacterial that will lead to the mange and difficulty in explaining to loved ones or in the locker room.
• A bottle of liquid pump soap: Some brothels have cakes of soap and gents you don’t want to wash your arse on a piece of soap that 10,000 underserving poor have wiped their arses with.
• A set of slippers: The floors in the joins were the repository of condoms from the previous 500 fucks and that floor hasn’t ever been washed. Catch my drift?
• Incense sticks, holder and a lighter: This knocks out the bad odor in the joint and can help it become a ‘spiritual experience’.
• A hammer, nails and wood: Having this is being prepared. Once I saw a sign that said ‘Rooms for $50 a night but you must make your own bed’. Once inside they gave me hammer, nails and wood. Also you might need these to repair the roof or something so it doesn’t fall in on you while you are doing the dirty deed.
• One litre bottle of Listerine: This is good for the mouth to clean it out as best as you can, plus can be a substitute for the hand sanitiser if you forget to bring it.
This is not everything you will need. It is just the bare essentials.
The second thing I want to mention is that evaluating what’s going on after a session is over is problematic as in life we don’t often know what is happening or why.
My nephew Efrem Zimbalist Farquar and I were talking the other day and the following interaction occurred.
Steven: Have you ever noticed that people don’t know what’s going on most of the time?
Farquar: What do you mean?
Steven: If you ask someone “How are you?” and they say “Bad” and you ask “Why?” What happens?
Farquar: I guess they tell you what’s happening that is bad for them.
Steven: Right. But if you ask them how they are and they say “Good” and you ask “Why?’ What happens then?
Farquar: You tell me.
Steven: They usually get a strange expression and usually say “I don’t know”.
Farquar: You’re kidding.
Steven: Try it and you’ll get the dumb look and “I don’t know”.
And that is true. When people are happy and things going well they don’t know why. So usually we are out of touch with what is happening to us about 50% of the time.
This brings us to Lily.
Let me note that except for the hand sanitiser I did NOT bring the essential items I should have. You guessed it, the room was dark and I was lucky to see my hand in front of my face!
I deliberately asked for Lily even though I had not seen her before based on some previous reviews I’d read somewhere.
Lily said she was 26, but I suspect 36. She has a pretty face, almost D cups with nice dark nipples. She has a bit of a tummy, but is no bbw. She has a trimmed pussy that is reasonably tight and her English is functional for the situation at hand.
She is quite friendly and service oriented. She is prepared to offer dfk, gfe, bbj with cim and covered sex in any and all positions and does all this with a positive attitude. I really liked her face and her manner was quite appealing. She was especially effective in cowgirl where she had a nice sway to her hips that was exciting. There was a little, but not too much, FOAM (FAKE ORGASM AND MOANING).
After the punt I exchanged the following text messages with Farquar.
Farquar: How was the punt?
Steven: Good.
Farquar: Why?
Steven: (Strange expression on my face) I don’t know.
When will our paths cross in my next review? I don’t know that either.
Next review from this dump will be Kylie.
Steven