Steven Seagal
26-01-2014, 05:29 PM
Lily’s Massage and Reflexology
300 Illawarra Road
Marrickville.
Greetings Gang,
This is a review of Amanda.
(Note: This is the best experience I have ever had in a massage parlour.)
Before I get too exuberant and wax too lyrical about this experience, there was one fly in the ointment. After all was finished I went down the hallway to have a shower. Now there are two showers in this place and Amanda accidently directed me into the wrong one where a bloke was showering. As I opened the door the following exchange took place:
Punter: (All soaped up and shocked.) Who the fuck are you?
Steven: I am Steven Seagal.
Punter: You don’t look anything like Steven Seagal.
Steven: Have you met me before?
Punter: No.
Steven: Then how the fuck do you know what I do or do not look like?
I then made a hasty retreat to the other toilet, much to the chagrin of Amanda, until I know ‘Soapy’ had departed.
Folks, when I go to a joint I fall down stairs: I fall upstairs. I stub my toe and lose my toenail. I walk in on a small skinny guy fucking a huge Asian milf in the arse and he says:
Skinny guy: What are you looking at?
Steven: A skinny white guy fucking a fat Asian milf in the arse?
I’ve had Jess from Porky’s tell me “I don’t think you can get your wee-wee up!”. I have had a wl in Parramatta going through my wallet while I was showering and later claimed she was looking for a condom. I’ve fallen asleep on a massage table in Burwood for 2 hours and they tried to bill me for the time. I was in a place that was raided by The Department of Immigration and interrogated. The following interaction ensued:
Immigration officer: And what are you doing here?
Steven: Hoping to have weenie roast.
Officer: A weenie roast?
Steven: Yes, I’m not allowed to cook in the boarding house where I live.
Officer: You could be in big trouble.
Steven: For what? Having my pants unzipped without a license?
So, this little fly in the ointment was only a blip on the radar screen that is my life.
THE PUNT:
It was a real toss up as to whether I should go to 12 Bellevue, Red Sunset, Billy’s in Marrickville or 24 Station Street. I decided on Station Street, but as I walked toward it I saw a massage sign at 300 Illawarra Rd. Now, I tend to go to the same places over and over so I decided to take a real punt and try this place out.
Lily’s is located out there in the open for everyone to see. It has dodgy written all over it. There is the cheap neon ‘Open’ sign displayed. You walk up the dingy stairs, where halfway up a buzzer goes off. At the top of the stairs are some dollar shop fairy lights shining away. The inside is rather dark and not inviting. I was met by an attractive Asian lady dressed like the was about to go out clubbing and she directed me into a room where Carla appeared. The room wer etycal Asian low level massage room. There was a in the corner and a chair to place my duds on.
Carla was a cute school girl type and asked how long I wanted. I said an hour and gave her $55 for the 60 minutes. Reception returned and said that Carla had a booking and I could see her and her name was Amanda.
Amanda is VERY pretty. She is about 27, Korean, A Cups, sexy lips, reasonable English and said I’d have a good time. She was right!
Folks when I get the hotties I usually get the cold shoulder. I also find Korean girls to be mechanical and gfe or pse with them is totally a fantasy. Of course even Steven Seagal can be wrong some times.
I am not going to give a blow by blow. Let me just say this. She has poor massage skills and is outstanding in everything else and I will leave it at that.
She is sexy, friendly, energetic and does not offer FOAM (Fake Orgasm and Moaning.) She is the real deal.
Will I go back? Absolutely. By the way, Amanda said she prefers to work in massage parlours as she chooses how things will go and she likes men who are both gentle and respectful.
I’ve got to go now.
Catch you all again soon.
Until that time friends . . .Until that time.
Steven
300 Illawarra Road
Marrickville.
Greetings Gang,
This is a review of Amanda.
(Note: This is the best experience I have ever had in a massage parlour.)
Before I get too exuberant and wax too lyrical about this experience, there was one fly in the ointment. After all was finished I went down the hallway to have a shower. Now there are two showers in this place and Amanda accidently directed me into the wrong one where a bloke was showering. As I opened the door the following exchange took place:
Punter: (All soaped up and shocked.) Who the fuck are you?
Steven: I am Steven Seagal.
Punter: You don’t look anything like Steven Seagal.
Steven: Have you met me before?
Punter: No.
Steven: Then how the fuck do you know what I do or do not look like?
I then made a hasty retreat to the other toilet, much to the chagrin of Amanda, until I know ‘Soapy’ had departed.
Folks, when I go to a joint I fall down stairs: I fall upstairs. I stub my toe and lose my toenail. I walk in on a small skinny guy fucking a huge Asian milf in the arse and he says:
Skinny guy: What are you looking at?
Steven: A skinny white guy fucking a fat Asian milf in the arse?
I’ve had Jess from Porky’s tell me “I don’t think you can get your wee-wee up!”. I have had a wl in Parramatta going through my wallet while I was showering and later claimed she was looking for a condom. I’ve fallen asleep on a massage table in Burwood for 2 hours and they tried to bill me for the time. I was in a place that was raided by The Department of Immigration and interrogated. The following interaction ensued:
Immigration officer: And what are you doing here?
Steven: Hoping to have weenie roast.
Officer: A weenie roast?
Steven: Yes, I’m not allowed to cook in the boarding house where I live.
Officer: You could be in big trouble.
Steven: For what? Having my pants unzipped without a license?
So, this little fly in the ointment was only a blip on the radar screen that is my life.
THE PUNT:
It was a real toss up as to whether I should go to 12 Bellevue, Red Sunset, Billy’s in Marrickville or 24 Station Street. I decided on Station Street, but as I walked toward it I saw a massage sign at 300 Illawarra Rd. Now, I tend to go to the same places over and over so I decided to take a real punt and try this place out.
Lily’s is located out there in the open for everyone to see. It has dodgy written all over it. There is the cheap neon ‘Open’ sign displayed. You walk up the dingy stairs, where halfway up a buzzer goes off. At the top of the stairs are some dollar shop fairy lights shining away. The inside is rather dark and not inviting. I was met by an attractive Asian lady dressed like the was about to go out clubbing and she directed me into a room where Carla appeared. The room wer etycal Asian low level massage room. There was a in the corner and a chair to place my duds on.
Carla was a cute school girl type and asked how long I wanted. I said an hour and gave her $55 for the 60 minutes. Reception returned and said that Carla had a booking and I could see her and her name was Amanda.
Amanda is VERY pretty. She is about 27, Korean, A Cups, sexy lips, reasonable English and said I’d have a good time. She was right!
Folks when I get the hotties I usually get the cold shoulder. I also find Korean girls to be mechanical and gfe or pse with them is totally a fantasy. Of course even Steven Seagal can be wrong some times.
I am not going to give a blow by blow. Let me just say this. She has poor massage skills and is outstanding in everything else and I will leave it at that.
She is sexy, friendly, energetic and does not offer FOAM (Fake Orgasm and Moaning.) She is the real deal.
Will I go back? Absolutely. By the way, Amanda said she prefers to work in massage parlours as she chooses how things will go and she likes men who are both gentle and respectful.
I’ve got to go now.
Catch you all again soon.
Until that time friends . . .Until that time.
Steven